Be Still – a post pre Vipassana

ssshhh
I am on a countdown now, 3 days until I start my first Vipassana course in Hereford.

Vipassana is a meditation technique, and way of living life, that is taught over a 10 day course, in complete silence. As they explain on their website;

 

Vipassana means “to see things as they really are”. It is a process of self-purification by self-observation.

You are told to leave at home; any reading/writing materials, music, technology including mobile phones. During the 10 days you do not speak, gesture, smile or look at anyone apart from a couple of hour long slots each day if you have a burning question about the course to ask the teacher. I can’t practice yoga, the only exercise being available is to walk around the grounds on the breaks. This will be my schedule for the 10 days, and my thoughts about it….

4:00 am Morning wake-up bell  …..fine I am an early riser anyway

4:30-6:30 am Meditate in the hall or in your room  ……2 hours?! before food?!

6:30-8:00 am Breakfast break …..phew, I will make sure to eat as much as possible

8:00-9:00 am Group meditation in the hall …..nice, although I have heard in these group sessions you are not allowed to move?! What if my leg goes dead?

9:00-11:00 am Meditate in the hall or in your room according to the teacher’s instructions…phew if I do it in my room I can at least move a little if I need to

11:00-12:00 noon Lunch break …..isn’t that a bit early for lunch?!

12noon-1:00 pm Rest and interviews with the teacher ……..rest, yay! Wonder if I can sneak a downward facing dog in somewhere, my body will need a stretch.

1:00-2:30 pm Meditate in the hall or in your room …….cool

2:30-3:30 pm Group meditation in the hall ……..meditating in a group will be easier

3:30-5:00 pm Meditate in the hall or in your own room according to the teacher’s instructions  …..I think I may be a bit bored of meditating by now

5:00-6:00 pm Tea break …….tea, yay! Hope there are some biscuits with that.

6:00-7:00 pm Group meditation in the hall ……sure will be glad to be back in the group. What if my leg goes dead?!

7:00-8:15 pm Teacher’s Discourse in the hall  …….good, something to listen to, a break from meditation

8:15-9:00 pm Group meditation in the hall ……more?! What if my leg goes dead?!

9:00-9:30 pm Question time in the hall ……oh good, a chance to speak, will I want to though in front of a group?

9:30 pm Retire to your own room–Lights out ……hold on, when was dinner?!

The closer I get to it the more I am experiencing longing silence, a break from my mobile, from checking Facebook, from watching TV shows, from just doing. I am also finding myself starting to question how on earth I will be able to sit still for that length of time, won’t my body ache from sitting so much and not practising my yoga. As you can see from above, my mind is already wondering if I can sneak a few downward facing dogs in the toilet, ha ha.

My mind is starting to worry a little about getting bored, what the food will be like (I have a nut allergy so have to be careful) and how will I cope with not having a meal in the evening?! The thought of having lunch at 11-12, then just a cup of tea at 6 seems impossible for 10 days. I know if I go to bed hungry I don’t sleep.

Then my soul is looking forward to all of this, reminding myself of my lovely times in the ashram in India and how I loved that time away from life, time to meditate and think about the bigger picture. I could speak to people there though. In the ashram we only had 2 meals a day, plus tea time, and I felt great for it. I found I actually didn’t need as much sleep when I ate less.

My soul is itching to turn my phone off and log off from Facebook! This is going to be a brilliant digital detox.

I ask myself why am I doing this, what is my intention of 10 days in silence? I don’t feel like I have anything to “deal with” or “to process” but I am sure something will come up that will surprise me.

My intention of Vipassana, is to just be still. To stop all the doing. To be able to hear my inner Self and God. To listen to my heart’s guidance around what is next for me. To learn a new meditation technique and learn potentially another new way of living life. It’s a progression of of my journey over the past few years, the next step.

So those are my thoughts, and concerns, 3 days before Vipassana. I hadn’t really given it much thought until I start to read the guidelines again and what to bring on their website last night. This resulted in me dreaming about it before waking this morning, there were two minutes left before we began and I hadn’t yet set my out of office or recorded a voice-mail to say I was out of touch……. funny the things that come up isn’t it? Ha ha.

So that’s me over and out, I will of course report back when I am out of the other side 🙂

Namaste

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