I recently re read Men Are From Mars Women are From Venus by John Gray. I first got it when I was a teenager and think I probably only flicked through it quickly back then, oh how I wish I had paid a bit more attention now!
It’s such an insightful book about the differences between men and women, we really are different species. One bit I found helpful to understand is that we both fluctuate in and out of relationship. Gray likens men to rubber bands, one minute they will be fully with you then the next they feel the need to pull back to get their independence and autonomy, to allow themselves to miss you then they spring back.
Where as he says women are more like waves, when at their peak they are feeling loved, good about themselves, have a lot of love to give and in their own power then they can dip into needing reassurance, feeling empty and emotional.
What often happens is when a man pulls back needing his space the woman will try and go after him, needing reassurance, which makes them want to stretch further away. Understanding the need for space and just allowing them to get on with it, while you do things you love to do helps. Just as if a woman is in a dip for a man to acknowledge that and give her a bit of extra love will save the day!
I can relate to all of this so much, I sometimes think I am a bit like a man! Whilst I love to be in a relationship I also still love all the other aspects of my life. When I get close to someone I can sometimes feel a bit like I am loosing myself so I then find myself distancing myself again to get back in my power. I also go in waves of feeling great and then needing a bit of reassurance, so thankfully I am feminine as well, and this is all totally normal, phew.
What the book does is gives you an insight into each others behaviours and relationship values, so you can start to understand our differences to be able have compassion and respect for each others needs.
I had an interesting realisation last week around feeling lack of money, I came up with a combination of questions that helped me to get out of it and create intention instead. From feeling lack I moved into inspiration quickly and had some steps to get myself in action. Here they are:
What I am lacking?
Why do I want more of X?
What will I be doing when I have more X?
How will I be being?
Switch this around into affirmations such as:
I am generous
I am financially independent
I am free
I am love
I am a published author
……and so on.
From here consider what actions you could take to be “being” your intention?
Just work through these and see how you feel.
My intentions at the moment are to:
- Teach more yoga
- Write my book on intention!
- Be KIND…..look for random acts of kindness I can do daily
I am offering a couple of different coaching opportunities at the moment to help you create your intentions for 2014. The 1-1 option is as follows:
Set yourself up for a great year ahead with a 4 hour Create 2014 Coaching Session. This will include:
- A review of 2013
- Intention (Goal) setting & planning how you’ll achieve them
- Manifestation techniques to help make your dreams a reality
- NLP to help you be in the best mindset to really go for it
*****Discount for bookings made before 31st December – £150*****, usual price £240.
An alternative option if you prefer to work in a group is a series of group coaching sessions with me in Hove, the first Sundays of each month from December to February.
- The first session in December (1st) will be to review 2013 and create your intentions for 2014.
- In January (4th) we will look at what you need to do and who you need to be to manifest your intentions.
- In February (1st) we will look at anything that might be getting in the way of you achieving your intentions.
All sessions will include time for guided meditation. Each session is £40 or there is a discount for booking all 3 at £100.
Please contact me if you have any questions or would like to book; [email protected]/ 07779 150886